Not so silent..

How?

How could I not see this coming a mile away? I have been so aware and so focused on doing what I need to and then you came along.

Distraction

Distraction, I got so lost in you and what you wanted and what you needed. I did not even realize that all the negative words you were feeding me was causing me to change. Not for the better either. I did not realize that word by word you were causing me to lose sight of who I am. I looked so different by the time I finally realized that I had not even looked at myself is so much time. I did not realize that your words were feeding me so much that I did not even like me which is why I could not face me in the mirror.

I did not realize that trying to satisfy your needs I was not taking care of my own. I was walking around like why is there still so much I need to do when I have been doing so much?

That is because you were busy just not tending to your own things instead you were tending to distractions things. You made distractions priorities your necessities. “ouch”

Now you are fighting a battle between you and you as you slowly remove distraction out of your head space. The more you clear house the clearer you can see you starting to reappear. And they say mental illness is not real. Some are dealing with it and do not even know they are some are so blinded by closed mindedness that they cannot see their own pain let alone anyone around them that is in pain.

We can see a cut, we can see blood, we can see those kinds of hurt but we cannot see the pain that is felt in the heart or in the head. Those kinds of hurts are the worse kind because it causes you to die really fast or really slow. Both hurt extremely and not just the person suffering but those connected to that person as well.

Let us make help the new norm. Someone’s life and mental health depends on it.

Take your mask off also and let it be known that you want some help.

#itstartswithyou